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- Story Listed as: Fiction For Kids
- Theme: Science Fiction
- Subject: Adventure
- Published: 05/19/2021
The discovery
Born 2009, M, from Beaverton OR, United StatesThe sun blazed above the Nevada desert leaving the barren dirt road scorching. Another 100 miles south of Las Vegas was the infamous and mysterious Area 51 and Eli was anxious to arrive. He had been driving for five days already. After being fired from his job at a small-town gas station, Eli decided to use his new freedom to wander the desert of Nevada. Even though it was his home state, he never really got a chance to explore it. So he decided to rent a car and experience the Nevada territory firsthand.
The very next day he was ready to go exploring. He had his backpack and his good friend Kyle. Kyle was a big dog and he loved to eat bacon. Kyle made himself at home and lay in the back seat sleeping. Eli was starting to sweat. His air conditioning had gone out 60 miles ago and the heat was starting to set in. He had a bandana next to him that he used to wipe the sweat from his face. Kyle, on the other hand, did not seem to be bothered. There was a bucket of water on the backseat floor that Eli filled with ice at every rest stop.
Driving hours a day, Eli had a lot of time to reflect on his life. At the age of 34, he had experienced more loss than those much older than he was. At the age of 10, he had been riding in a car with his parents in Portland, Oregon when a drunk semi-truck driver slammed into the front of their car killing his parents. With no other relatives except a grandmother who he had never met, Eli was first put into foster care until the court could decide where he should live. His grandmother was soon notified and agreed to take Eli in. However, she was 78 years old and not equipped to raise a 10-year-old. She did her best, though, before dying of pancreatic cancer two years later. Eli spent the next six years in and out of foster care. At the age of 18, he went and attended a very bad college but got a job as a gas station worker.
His first stop was little A’Le’Inn, The one, and only hotel near Area 51. On the way to it, Eli noticed that there was nothing but a bare desert surrounding him. To his surprise when he got there, 15 vehicles were parked in the parking lot. He climbed out of his Brown Toyota and walked into the lobby. Kyle was close behind him sniffing for any bacon. He waited in front of the check-in desk for two minutes before someone came over. “Hello my name is Jack, Welcome to A’le’inn. would you like to stay in a hotel room?” “For three days,” Eli replied as he handed the clerk his credit card. “Ok, your reservation is made and your room will be ready in 30 minutes.” “Ok,” said Eli.
They went to the cafe and sat down at a table. “Hello would you like to order something?” asked a waiter. “Umm, I’ll have the alien burger with fries and a coke,” replied Eli. “Anything else?” asked the waiter. Kyle grumbled. “Also a bacon burger for the dog,” added Eli. Then the waiter walked away. After they ate it had been 36 minutes, so Eli went to the check-in desk and got the keycard to his room. He walked out to his car and brought his luggage in. That night Kyle and Eli were watching Godzilla when a knock on his door echoed through the room. Eli went to the door to see that nothing was there. “Ok?” Eli mumbled. He closed the door.
Eli closed the TV and climbed into bed. The next morning Eli went down to the lobby to get breakfast. After he ate, he climbed into his car and went exploring the area. After driving for 3 hours he began to see some buildings in the distance. He drove closer and then stopped at a sign that said: "No trespassing - fine of $50,000 will be issued for anyone who passes this border." He was very curious about what was in the buildings so he decided to take a drone and fly it into the building area. The next day Eli returned with a big drone and flew it over the buildings. Then slowly he flew it inside the buildings. He saw a big round disk before his drone was knocked down by an army man who was big and bald with sunburns on his legs, he also had a big camouflage vest on and some camo pants. He stared in the direction of Eli before walking back into the building. Luckily he didn’t notice Eli. Eli hopped into the car and drove off as fast as he could. Later back at the Inn he lay in his bed before a knock came on the door. He opened the door to see the same Army man staring at him.
“Uh, HI” Eli mumbled. “Hello I am Bruan and I have just come to check if there was a knock on your door last night.” said the army man in a low scratchy voice. Eli’s eyes shot up and he said “Yes! There was a knock on my door. When I answered it no one was there.” “Thank You.” Said John then closed the door. Kyle was looking at Eli with his “I want Bacon face” “Fine.” Eli said and they walked down to the Cafe. After Kyle got his Bacon treat they went and checked out the Game room. When he walked in there were a lot of people playing Pool. Eli walked out of the room and sat in his room for a long time before he went down for dinner. Later in the middle of the night, he heard another knock on his door. This time Eli just went back to sleep. But in the morning he heard another knock. This time he answered the door and it was the waiter. “Umm, hi.” Said Eli. The waiter, who was dressed in an Elvis Presley shirt, was staring at him. “Um ok?” mumbled Eli. “Hello?” Eli waved his hand in front of the waiter. The waiter suddenly charged at Eli and grabbed the scruff of the collared shirt. The waiter with incredible strength lifted him up. “Oh my god!” shouted Eli. Kyle rushed forward and bit the waiter’s leg. “OW!!!” shouted the waiter then kicked Kyle across the room. Now that made Eli angry. The waiter sneered, Eli kicked the waiter away and pushed him out of the room. Then the waiter ran off and started shouting. “There’s a crazy guest!!” Eli slammed the door shut and checked on Kyle who was sleeping on the couch for some reason.
That night Eli heard the waiter walking up and down the hallway saying some language Eli didn’t understand. Eli jumped out of bed and called 911. “Hello 911 what’s your emergency?” asked the receiver. “Umm, there’s someone in my hotel doing something sus.” “What does sus mean?” asked the receiver. “It means suspicious,” replied Eli. “Ok sending one cruiser over to check.” replied the receiver. Eli jumped onto the bed and Kyle curled up next to him. He heard an officer shout “Hands Up!!” to the waiter. The waiter screamed then ran off with the policeman chasing after him. A few minutes later Eli walked out of his room to see police tape covering the hallways. “Looks like a tornado of police tape barraged through here” he commented.
The very next day he woke up to a bright light shining into his eyes. “I’ve been kidnapped by aliens!” he shouted. “Oh wait it’s the sun.” he realized. He walked out of his room and stepped over the piles of police tape. He walked downstairs and ate his breakfast before taking his drone to go exploring again. He drove for 3 hours and reached the area where he saw the buildings. He took his drone out and parked his car right behind a tree so it was covered. He hid behind his car and flew the drone over the fence and on top of the building. He closely looked into his camera and saw a big box full of tranquilizer darts and tablets in them. He saw a big army truck pull up and load the boxes into the back. Then suddenly a hand reached out and pulled the drone back. It tossed the drone off the roof and Eli saw the drone crash onto the floor. He saw a green, slimy hand with three fingers grab his drone and it stared into the camera like it was watching him. The creature’s two eyes were both black although one eye had some sort of scar over it. It had grey and black hair all over it but it also had a big mouthful of teeth that were very sharp. Its endless black eyes bored into Eli and he started inching towards his car. Then Kyle barked before the Wolf-like creature whipped around and stared at Eli. Eli jumped into his car and turned the keys. The army men started racing after him pumping their big arms as a helicopter flew away towards the mountains next to the building. Eli stomped on the gas pedal and sped away. the large, buff army men jumped into their green big jeeps and sped after him. Then he looked back real quick past Kyle’s big bulky head to see an army man wearing a black vest with a white snake with pixelated eyes on the front. He recognized it but didn’t remember the name of the thing it belonged to. The army men jumped into the army trucks next to the building and started them with a loud vroom! They started chasing him like a police chase but with army trucks. Then he turned right and sped behind the big dark army trucks. But then he peeked back again to see some army men in black and white camo suits come running out. They started shouting that someone had stolen their army trucks. One army man was even wearing an apron and a chef hat, so Eli assumed they were having lunch. Eli then started slowing down and was surprised that the army men ran right past him towards the trucks. Then he remembered that the symbols belonged to a super-intelligent but evil hacking group, which were like evil versions of James Bond. The army men swerved their trucks left which caused Eli to follow in pursuit. But his car was just a small minivan so it could not do that kind of turn. SO it flipped over and hit the ground with a loud BOOM!
Kyle barked and then crawled on the roof of the flipped-over minivan to Eli. Then Eli grabbed a shovel he had in the trunk and tried to break open the car window. But the window was too tough, so he had to use his emergency crowbar that he kept in his trunk to break open the window. The window shattered and the glass sprayed on his face. He and Kyle climbed out from the car to see nothing but some cactus and abandoned army trucks in their view. They walked over to the army trucks and peeked inside to find nothing. So they walked over to the building far in the distance. To their surprise, nothing was in there so he walked back to the army truck and started searching for the keys to the truck. He dug around then felt a cold metal-like object and pulled out a single key attached to a steel ring. He jammed the key into the keyhole and turned it. But the keyhole wouldn’t turn so he tried harder. Then the worst happened, the key snapped and the snap echoed through the truck. He reached around looking for a walkie-talkie-like object to call a helicopter to come to pick him up. Then he felt his pocket and pulled out his phone which only had 10% battery left so he quickly called his friend who lived in Las Vegas to come to pick him up. “Where are you?” his friend asked in a gruff voice. “I’m at Area 51.” he said then hung up.
Then about 4 and a half hours later, he heard a car sound moving towards his location. He peeked out the windshield to see a black jeep driving towards him. He then spotted a big, tall man sitting in the driver’s seat. He opened the door and ran over to the car. “Finally you came.” He told the man. Then suddenly he shouted out, “Let’s get hacking.” they both ran into the building and started hacking everything and downloading the software. The reason Eli came was to hack and steal info from area 51. He wanted all the information that it had.
The discovery(Nicholas)
The sun blazed above the Nevada desert leaving the barren dirt road scorching. Another 100 miles south of Las Vegas was the infamous and mysterious Area 51 and Eli was anxious to arrive. He had been driving for five days already. After being fired from his job at a small-town gas station, Eli decided to use his new freedom to wander the desert of Nevada. Even though it was his home state, he never really got a chance to explore it. So he decided to rent a car and experience the Nevada territory firsthand.
The very next day he was ready to go exploring. He had his backpack and his good friend Kyle. Kyle was a big dog and he loved to eat bacon. Kyle made himself at home and lay in the back seat sleeping. Eli was starting to sweat. His air conditioning had gone out 60 miles ago and the heat was starting to set in. He had a bandana next to him that he used to wipe the sweat from his face. Kyle, on the other hand, did not seem to be bothered. There was a bucket of water on the backseat floor that Eli filled with ice at every rest stop.
Driving hours a day, Eli had a lot of time to reflect on his life. At the age of 34, he had experienced more loss than those much older than he was. At the age of 10, he had been riding in a car with his parents in Portland, Oregon when a drunk semi-truck driver slammed into the front of their car killing his parents. With no other relatives except a grandmother who he had never met, Eli was first put into foster care until the court could decide where he should live. His grandmother was soon notified and agreed to take Eli in. However, she was 78 years old and not equipped to raise a 10-year-old. She did her best, though, before dying of pancreatic cancer two years later. Eli spent the next six years in and out of foster care. At the age of 18, he went and attended a very bad college but got a job as a gas station worker.
His first stop was little A’Le’Inn, The one, and only hotel near Area 51. On the way to it, Eli noticed that there was nothing but a bare desert surrounding him. To his surprise when he got there, 15 vehicles were parked in the parking lot. He climbed out of his Brown Toyota and walked into the lobby. Kyle was close behind him sniffing for any bacon. He waited in front of the check-in desk for two minutes before someone came over. “Hello my name is Jack, Welcome to A’le’inn. would you like to stay in a hotel room?” “For three days,” Eli replied as he handed the clerk his credit card. “Ok, your reservation is made and your room will be ready in 30 minutes.” “Ok,” said Eli.
They went to the cafe and sat down at a table. “Hello would you like to order something?” asked a waiter. “Umm, I’ll have the alien burger with fries and a coke,” replied Eli. “Anything else?” asked the waiter. Kyle grumbled. “Also a bacon burger for the dog,” added Eli. Then the waiter walked away. After they ate it had been 36 minutes, so Eli went to the check-in desk and got the keycard to his room. He walked out to his car and brought his luggage in. That night Kyle and Eli were watching Godzilla when a knock on his door echoed through the room. Eli went to the door to see that nothing was there. “Ok?” Eli mumbled. He closed the door.
Eli closed the TV and climbed into bed. The next morning Eli went down to the lobby to get breakfast. After he ate, he climbed into his car and went exploring the area. After driving for 3 hours he began to see some buildings in the distance. He drove closer and then stopped at a sign that said: "No trespassing - fine of $50,000 will be issued for anyone who passes this border." He was very curious about what was in the buildings so he decided to take a drone and fly it into the building area. The next day Eli returned with a big drone and flew it over the buildings. Then slowly he flew it inside the buildings. He saw a big round disk before his drone was knocked down by an army man who was big and bald with sunburns on his legs, he also had a big camouflage vest on and some camo pants. He stared in the direction of Eli before walking back into the building. Luckily he didn’t notice Eli. Eli hopped into the car and drove off as fast as he could. Later back at the Inn he lay in his bed before a knock came on the door. He opened the door to see the same Army man staring at him.
“Uh, HI” Eli mumbled. “Hello I am Bruan and I have just come to check if there was a knock on your door last night.” said the army man in a low scratchy voice. Eli’s eyes shot up and he said “Yes! There was a knock on my door. When I answered it no one was there.” “Thank You.” Said John then closed the door. Kyle was looking at Eli with his “I want Bacon face” “Fine.” Eli said and they walked down to the Cafe. After Kyle got his Bacon treat they went and checked out the Game room. When he walked in there were a lot of people playing Pool. Eli walked out of the room and sat in his room for a long time before he went down for dinner. Later in the middle of the night, he heard another knock on his door. This time Eli just went back to sleep. But in the morning he heard another knock. This time he answered the door and it was the waiter. “Umm, hi.” Said Eli. The waiter, who was dressed in an Elvis Presley shirt, was staring at him. “Um ok?” mumbled Eli. “Hello?” Eli waved his hand in front of the waiter. The waiter suddenly charged at Eli and grabbed the scruff of the collared shirt. The waiter with incredible strength lifted him up. “Oh my god!” shouted Eli. Kyle rushed forward and bit the waiter’s leg. “OW!!!” shouted the waiter then kicked Kyle across the room. Now that made Eli angry. The waiter sneered, Eli kicked the waiter away and pushed him out of the room. Then the waiter ran off and started shouting. “There’s a crazy guest!!” Eli slammed the door shut and checked on Kyle who was sleeping on the couch for some reason.
That night Eli heard the waiter walking up and down the hallway saying some language Eli didn’t understand. Eli jumped out of bed and called 911. “Hello 911 what’s your emergency?” asked the receiver. “Umm, there’s someone in my hotel doing something sus.” “What does sus mean?” asked the receiver. “It means suspicious,” replied Eli. “Ok sending one cruiser over to check.” replied the receiver. Eli jumped onto the bed and Kyle curled up next to him. He heard an officer shout “Hands Up!!” to the waiter. The waiter screamed then ran off with the policeman chasing after him. A few minutes later Eli walked out of his room to see police tape covering the hallways. “Looks like a tornado of police tape barraged through here” he commented.
The very next day he woke up to a bright light shining into his eyes. “I’ve been kidnapped by aliens!” he shouted. “Oh wait it’s the sun.” he realized. He walked out of his room and stepped over the piles of police tape. He walked downstairs and ate his breakfast before taking his drone to go exploring again. He drove for 3 hours and reached the area where he saw the buildings. He took his drone out and parked his car right behind a tree so it was covered. He hid behind his car and flew the drone over the fence and on top of the building. He closely looked into his camera and saw a big box full of tranquilizer darts and tablets in them. He saw a big army truck pull up and load the boxes into the back. Then suddenly a hand reached out and pulled the drone back. It tossed the drone off the roof and Eli saw the drone crash onto the floor. He saw a green, slimy hand with three fingers grab his drone and it stared into the camera like it was watching him. The creature’s two eyes were both black although one eye had some sort of scar over it. It had grey and black hair all over it but it also had a big mouthful of teeth that were very sharp. Its endless black eyes bored into Eli and he started inching towards his car. Then Kyle barked before the Wolf-like creature whipped around and stared at Eli. Eli jumped into his car and turned the keys. The army men started racing after him pumping their big arms as a helicopter flew away towards the mountains next to the building. Eli stomped on the gas pedal and sped away. the large, buff army men jumped into their green big jeeps and sped after him. Then he looked back real quick past Kyle’s big bulky head to see an army man wearing a black vest with a white snake with pixelated eyes on the front. He recognized it but didn’t remember the name of the thing it belonged to. The army men jumped into the army trucks next to the building and started them with a loud vroom! They started chasing him like a police chase but with army trucks. Then he turned right and sped behind the big dark army trucks. But then he peeked back again to see some army men in black and white camo suits come running out. They started shouting that someone had stolen their army trucks. One army man was even wearing an apron and a chef hat, so Eli assumed they were having lunch. Eli then started slowing down and was surprised that the army men ran right past him towards the trucks. Then he remembered that the symbols belonged to a super-intelligent but evil hacking group, which were like evil versions of James Bond. The army men swerved their trucks left which caused Eli to follow in pursuit. But his car was just a small minivan so it could not do that kind of turn. SO it flipped over and hit the ground with a loud BOOM!
Kyle barked and then crawled on the roof of the flipped-over minivan to Eli. Then Eli grabbed a shovel he had in the trunk and tried to break open the car window. But the window was too tough, so he had to use his emergency crowbar that he kept in his trunk to break open the window. The window shattered and the glass sprayed on his face. He and Kyle climbed out from the car to see nothing but some cactus and abandoned army trucks in their view. They walked over to the army trucks and peeked inside to find nothing. So they walked over to the building far in the distance. To their surprise, nothing was in there so he walked back to the army truck and started searching for the keys to the truck. He dug around then felt a cold metal-like object and pulled out a single key attached to a steel ring. He jammed the key into the keyhole and turned it. But the keyhole wouldn’t turn so he tried harder. Then the worst happened, the key snapped and the snap echoed through the truck. He reached around looking for a walkie-talkie-like object to call a helicopter to come to pick him up. Then he felt his pocket and pulled out his phone which only had 10% battery left so he quickly called his friend who lived in Las Vegas to come to pick him up. “Where are you?” his friend asked in a gruff voice. “I’m at Area 51.” he said then hung up.
Then about 4 and a half hours later, he heard a car sound moving towards his location. He peeked out the windshield to see a black jeep driving towards him. He then spotted a big, tall man sitting in the driver’s seat. He opened the door and ran over to the car. “Finally you came.” He told the man. Then suddenly he shouted out, “Let’s get hacking.” they both ran into the building and started hacking everything and downloading the software. The reason Eli came was to hack and steal info from area 51. He wanted all the information that it had.
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Shelly Garrod
04/21/2023Your story offers a lot of detail, great descriptions and plenty of action. For a young writer Nicholas, I believe you have the potential to develop your skill as a writer. Great job.
Blessings Shelly
Help Us Understand What's Happening
Gail Moore
05/20/2021Fantastic and absolutely incredible writing for such a young person. Keep writing, you will go far :-)
ReplyHelp Us Understand What's Happening
Help Us Understand What's Happening
JD
05/19/2021Wow, I think that was really outstanding writing and storytelling for someone so young. Well done, Nicholas! : )
Pointers for future: The story started out well, and seemed to be carefully crafted and well thought out. I liked the backstory you added about your characters history. But then you didn't really finish the backstory or tie it in with the main story in any way. And so many different things happened after that that it got confusing and difficult to follow the actual storyline. Plus, your title and description were about a big discovery, but you never really clarified what that discovery was. Seems like aliens were discovered, but I'm not really sure. Was the hacking job they had planned going to prove it?
Even though your story left me with some questions and confusion, I still think you did a great job and it was a fun story. It is also nice to see a new story from you after so long. Thanks for sharing your short stories for kids on Storystar! : )
COMMENTS (3)