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- Story Listed as: True Life For Teens
- Theme: Family & Friends
- Subject: Friends / Friendship
- Published: 02/10/2021
Are they my friends?
Born 2006, F, from Immingham, United KingdomI am alone always alone. No one checks on me. No one cares for me yet I care for them. I don’t cry. I don’t pity myself. I just carry guilt on my shoulders. I know I'll never be good enough. I am too loud. To annoying. To short. To fat. To weird. They say I'm odd, different, forgotten. I hide my pain. I laugh it away. But what they don’t know is, it eats away at me. Makes me feel worthless. I lose all security. They don’t care what I do. They don’t feel the love I feel. Are they even my friends? Should I care? I don’t know anymore. I just want to hide. I don’t even want to see myself. Should I just hide? Should I find an emotionless pit and sink into it? as soon as I'm kind. As soon as I care. I am beaten like a punching bag. I feel my skin shiver and shake. I feel all my sadness. I feel their cries for help. But I can't reach them. I see their flaws but I can't fix them. I hear their words but can't correct them. What do I do? I just want to scream! I want to let go of everything! Never look back. But I won't. I fight and fight. And I will until it breaks me. Or am I already broken? I don’t cry anymore. But I feel the pain. It makes me literally shake. My stomach aches. My head hurts. But no tears. Yet my heart swells and begs for them. What have I done? How did I end up like this? What do they see that I don’t? Am I ugly? Am I mean? Am I over the top? What am I?! Please god what am I?
Nothing matters anyway. I am free. Happy. Kind. Funny. I smile. I laugh. I am fine. I am alive. I have a bed. I have family. I have friends...
Everything is perfect.
I constantly check my phone looking for something new but nothing is there.
I can't sleep at night.
But I'm fine like they say I have a perfect home, family and life. And that’s what I tell myself. or is it what they tell me...
Are they my friends?(Elise simpson)
I am alone always alone. No one checks on me. No one cares for me yet I care for them. I don’t cry. I don’t pity myself. I just carry guilt on my shoulders. I know I'll never be good enough. I am too loud. To annoying. To short. To fat. To weird. They say I'm odd, different, forgotten. I hide my pain. I laugh it away. But what they don’t know is, it eats away at me. Makes me feel worthless. I lose all security. They don’t care what I do. They don’t feel the love I feel. Are they even my friends? Should I care? I don’t know anymore. I just want to hide. I don’t even want to see myself. Should I just hide? Should I find an emotionless pit and sink into it? as soon as I'm kind. As soon as I care. I am beaten like a punching bag. I feel my skin shiver and shake. I feel all my sadness. I feel their cries for help. But I can't reach them. I see their flaws but I can't fix them. I hear their words but can't correct them. What do I do? I just want to scream! I want to let go of everything! Never look back. But I won't. I fight and fight. And I will until it breaks me. Or am I already broken? I don’t cry anymore. But I feel the pain. It makes me literally shake. My stomach aches. My head hurts. But no tears. Yet my heart swells and begs for them. What have I done? How did I end up like this? What do they see that I don’t? Am I ugly? Am I mean? Am I over the top? What am I?! Please god what am I?
Nothing matters anyway. I am free. Happy. Kind. Funny. I smile. I laugh. I am fine. I am alive. I have a bed. I have family. I have friends...
Everything is perfect.
I constantly check my phone looking for something new but nothing is there.
I can't sleep at night.
But I'm fine like they say I have a perfect home, family and life. And that’s what I tell myself. or is it what they tell me...
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